B D S M

• BD: Bondage and Discipline: Physical restraints, rule-setting, and punishments

• DS: Dominance and Submission: A consensual power imbalance where one person, the Dominant (Domme) takes control, and the other, the Submissive (Sub)

• SM: Sadism and Masochism: The consensual giving of pleasure from inflicting pain or humiliation (Sadism) or the pleasure from receiving it (Masochism)

Consensuality

Consensuality is the non-negotiable foundation of ethical BDSM practice, differentiating it from sexual assault or domestic violence. The community widely adheres to principles to ensure all activities are mutually agreed upon.

The SSC Principle

The most recognizable framework for ethical BDSM is the motto Safe, Sane, and Consensual (SSC):

• Safe: Measures are taken to minimize risk of physical or emotional harm, including using appropriate gear, understanding physical limitations, and having first-aid knowledge.

• Sane: All participants are of sound mind, able to make rational decisions, and understand the potential consequences of their actions.

• Consensual: All activities must be explicitly and enthusiastically agreed upon by all participants.

Negotiation and Boundaries

For BDSM to be consensual, all parties must engage in negotiation—detailed, sober discussions held before any play begins. This process establishes clear boundaries and expectations:

• Hard Limits: Activities that a participant will never engage in; these are strictly off-limits and must not be crossed.

• Soft Limits: Activities a participant is uncomfortable with but might be willing to try with caution, or that could be explored after more experience.

• Safeword: A predetermined word (that is not a normal part of the scene dialogue) that, when spoken, means the scene must stop immediately and without question. The use of a safeword revokes consent for the current activity.